By Madelyn Chung May 27, But it was also partially about me. During my teens and early 20s, I was vehemently against dating Asian guys. When friends tried to pair me up with the one Chinese guy in elementary school, as if we were meant to be because I was the only Chinese girl, I quickly became annoyed. I scoffed and walked away, irritated at the unspoken expectation that I should to stick to my own race. Now, I can see that I was surrounded by many, many problematic messages about the desirability of Asian men or lack thereof , which in turn led me to believe that they were socially awkward, passive, unattractive—and therefore not dateable. But I also thought being paired with an Asian guy would make me seem more Asian, which I definitely did not want. Being with a white guy felt like stepping stone to being less different, or like it would make me more like the white girls I wanted to be like. Then, of course, Hollywood and pop culture reinforced this idea.
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